Life is so unpredictable. Do you see the ‘un’ before ‘predictable’? It shows the lack of predictability, or in this case, fair warnings. I sat here with wet hair dripping on my skin, too much perfume on, and my study desk still in clear depiction of how my life was at that moment.
They were coming.
I still can’t believe I reacted that way. It felt kind of weird to freak out that way to the point I nearly went mad. That’s why I sat down here, needing to let it out my writing in my journal. I was afraid of just venting it out verbally, as I felt that the current situation and my reaction to it would lose its ‘juice’ if I didn’t record it somewhere. It’s a writer’s thing.
Besides that, my problem involved two girls (we’ll call them Girl A and Girl B), and they, along with my sister and I, were quite good friends when we were kids. Something happened, and they had to move away while their father stayed back here to work. And time froze between us until three years ago.
And then it froze up again.
But they came back for a short vacation here and we expected them to come visit in February. They didn’t…so I relaxed. Bad move. At exactly 1:04 p.m. today, my mom got off the phone, sat down, and said that Girl A and Girl B were coming.
Emphasis for panic?
Could this day get any worse?
Why was this happening to me?!
I went crazy! I washed the hair that I was too lazy to wash, jumped out of my comfy jeans, and took out all my frustration on my toothbrush. I felt weird, so out of place already, even if they hadn’t arrived yet.
Scenarios of them looking at me disgustingly or in any judgmental way poked the insides of my brain and tied knots in my stomach. I felt sick. I really don’t like how life jumps at you and screams “Boo!” and gets you all worked up and scared of what is to come. Although this feeling towards such situations wasn’t foreign to me, it’s happened lots of times; and the result?
Everything happens the exact opposite.
It’s just weird, you know. But, my fears never came true. We actually had a really good time! Kind of awkward at the beginning, but the oldest (Girl A) is like a professional icebreaker that we were catching up in less than five minutes upon their arrival. Her French accent and isolation from English for a while may have hindered some parts of our conversation, but she’s extremely funny and dramatic. We related a lot and really…we had a blast.
I feel stupid for being worked up about their visit though. But that leads me to tell you that being worried only makes your life harder for yourself and others. We all know that. Yeah, we have TONS of reasons to be worried, and we might even give in to some of them, but if you just sit there feeling sorry for yourself and thinking of what you could be doing instead of doing it, you’re wasting your time! It’s hard, but with God’s help, we can do anything 🙂
Every minute counts, guys! You’ll never get those minutes you spent reading my post back (*cough* haha), or worse, worrying over nothing! But worry or not, life will still move on. You can choose to hop on, or stay back. Your choice 🙂
P.S. I feel this post is a little…I don’t know, disconnected or something. Please don’t hesitate to tell me what you think! 😀
Disclaimer: I do not own those images. 😀